I’m not missing you

Oh, Oh
I’m not missing you
Been through just about everything that I could go through
When it comes to relationships
Don’t know what I was missing or why I ain’t listen
When I told myself that was it
Now here I go, hurt again
Cause of my curiosity
Now that it’s over
What else could it be he just had to cheat

[Pre-Chorus:]
I made a promise never to settle
Why didn’t I keep it?
‘Cause I hated the heartbreak
Crying and cheating, the fooling around

[Chorus:]
(But) I’m not missing you
I’m not going through the motions
Waiting and hoping you call me
I’m not missing you
You might have had me open
But I must be going because
I got life to do
I know I’m usually hanging on
I used to hate to see you gone
But this time its different
I don’t even feel the distance
I’m not missing
I’m not missing you

It’s a shame in a way cause
I feel that I may not ever find the right one for me
Did I leave him, is he right in front of my face oh
Will my true love ever be?
Why would I go on a search again
When I know what the end will be
What good is love when it keeps on hurting me?

[Pre-Chorus]

[Chorus x2]

No I can’t be with you
Cause I’m scared felt like I was falling when you left me
I can’t keep going through life
Unaware of what I missed
And the person I could be
Love’s good when its right
And when it’s left in your memory
All the times I let you down
I guess love will be nice for someone else’s life

[Chorus]

(But) I’m not missing you
I’m not going through the motions
Waiting and hoping you call me
(I’m not missing you)
You might have had me open
But I must be going because
(I got life to do)
I know I’m usually hanging on
I used to hate to see you gone
(I used to hate it)
Oh different, oh see the distance
I’m not missing
I’m not missing you

I’m not going through the motions
Waiting and hoping you call me (knockin’ at my door)
You might have had me open
But I must be going because
I know I’m usually hanging on
I used to hate to see you gone
Oh different, feel the distance
I’m not missing
I’m not missing you

I’m not missing
I’m not missing you(yeah, oooh)
I’m not missing you (oh baby)
I’m not missing you

_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_

Been through just about everything that I could go through
When it comes to relationships
Don’t know what I was missing or why I ain’t listen

This thing isn’t new to me, I’ve travelled this road before and I honestly don’t know what am I doing here again, seems like I never really learned my lesson. Well, it wasn’t the exact same thing, guess I only learned half of the lesson but I failed the other part so here I am again singing the same song.

Cause of my curiosity

You got me curious, why you do certain things, why you’re treating me that way and most importantly, what your next move will be. So I got here, because of my curiousity. So it’s true, curiosity killed the cat.

 I’m not going through the motions
Waiting and hoping you call me

I know that you wouldn’t call, it’s not your thing. I know you’ll somehow reach out and believe that you’re already exerting enough efforts but am I not worth more than that?

 You might have had me open
But I must be going because
I got life to do
I know I’m usually hanging on
I used to hate to see you gone
But this time its different
I don’t even feel the distance

The distance is literal but I don’t feel it, ’cause even before…your presence wasn’t really felt that much except on specific circumstances. Yes, despite of everything you might have had me, I want to hold on still, but you’re not giving me enough reasons to do so. So, instead of wasting my precious time with you, I’d rather go and spend it with those who are worthy of it.

It’s a shame in a way cause
I feel that I may not ever find the right one for me
Did I leave him, is he right in front of my face oh
Will my true love ever be?
Why would I go on a search again
When I know what the end will be
What good is love when it keeps on hurting me?

 Yes, it feels like giving up, it feels like love is never for me. I must admit that sometimes I’m asking myself if someone had come into my life during the times i spent with you but failed to notice ’cause I was blinded by you. I want to give up, I’ve already tried a lot of times but it always turns out the same, so maybe love for me exists just to hurt me.

I can’t keep going through life
Unaware of what I missed
And the person I could be
Love’s good when its right
And when it’s left in your memory

I can’t just wait a lifetime for you, I don’t want to miss life before it’s gone. Maybe this is not really meant for us, so whatever it is that we have if there is any…let us just keep it in our memories.

I guess love will be nice for someone else’s life

Has always been a failure on this, maybe it’s time to accept that love only works for others.

I’M NOT MISSING YOU

Saying this for more than ten times is cheating, hoping to convince myself but I think I’m not also good at that one. There are some lessons in life that no matter how simple it is, it is still so hard to learn. I’ve decided to give up before, gradually accepting that love isn’t really for me but due to some twist of fate, I changed my mind. I even prayed to ask for it. Then, you came…making me believe that I still have a chance at this, that maybe this time my story will have a different ending. But I was wrong, ’cause it seems that my life’s story on this aspect comes in a template, it always turns out the same even if I do things differently, so I guess the fault is not with me but I’m not saying that it’s with you either, maybe love isn’t really for me. So thanks for every thing.. that’s it..I’m not missing you…forgive me Lord, I’m lying.

Almost Lover

Your fingertips across my skin

The palm trees swaying in the wind images

You sang me spanish lullabies

The sweetest sadness in your eyes clever trick

Well I’d never want to see you unhappy

I thought you’d want the same for me

Goodbye my almost lover

Goodbye my hopeless dream

I’m trying not to think about you

Can’t you just let me be?

So long my luckless romance

My back is turned on you

Should’ve known you’d bring me heartache

Almost lovers always do

We walked along a crowded street

You took my hand and danced with me in the shade

And when you left you kissed my lips

You told me you would never ever forget these images no

Well I’d never want to see you unhappy

I thought you’d want the same for me

Goodbye my almost lover

Goodbye my hopeless dream

I’m trying not to think about you

Can’t you just let me be?

So long my luckless romance

My back is turned on you

Should’ve known you’d bring me heartache

Almost lovers always do

I cannot go to the ocean

I cannot try the streets at night

I cannot wake up in the morning

Without you on my mind

So you’re gone and i’m haunted

And I bet you are just fine

Did I make it that easy to walk

Right in and out of my life?

Goodbye my almost lover

Goodbye my hopeless dream

I’m trying not to think about you

Why can’t you just let me be?

So long my luckless romance

My back is turned on you

Should’ve known you’d bring me heartache

Almost lovers always do

“Almost but not quite, always near but never here, so it’s true to have it halfway is worse than not having it all. I don’t know where I stand? Am I a part of your life? Who am I to you?”

Marry You

It’s a beautiful night,
We’re looking for something dumb to do.
Hey baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Is it the look in your eyes,
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Well I know this little chapel on the boulevard we can go,
No one will know,
Come on girl.
Who cares if we’re trashed got a pocket full of cash we can blow,
Shots of patron,
And it’s on girl.

Don’t say no, no, no, no-no;
Just say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah;
And we’ll go, go, go, go-go.
If you’re ready, like I’m ready.

Cause it’s a beautiful night,
We’re looking for something dumb to do.
Hey baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Is it the look in your eyes,
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

I’ll go get a ring let the choir bells sing like oooh,
So whatcha wanna do?
Let’s just run girl.

If we wake up and you wanna break up that’s cool.
No, I won’t blame you;
It was fun girl.

Don’t say no, no, no, no-no;
Just say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah;
And we’ll go, go, go, go-go.
If you’re ready, like I’m ready.

Cause it’s a beautiful night,
We’re looking for something dumb to do.
Hey baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Is it the look in your eyes,
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Just say I do,
Tell me right now baby,
Tell me right now baby. x2

Cause it’s a beautiful night,
We’re looking for something dumb to do.
Hey baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

Is it the look in your eyes,
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares baby,
I think I wanna marry you.

I have a thing for weddings, I first heard this song from Glee and I must say I really enjoyed it. For me it’s like the opposite of what they usually say, that marriage is not a simple thing. Listening to this song makes me feel like, we don’t have to make things complicated, I want to marry you so let’s do it. I’m not saying that marriage is not a serious thing ’cause it really is, but oftentimes we focus on the logic part of the thing that’s why it becomes a lot more complicated than it really is when in fact the biggest thing about marriage is the love the two people has for each other, it’s not actually the love that makes it complicated but rather the non-love aspect that comes with it.

Need You Now

Picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor
Reachin’ for the phone ’cause I can’t fight it anymore 

It’s one of those times again, alone with the memories of you. Can’t help but miss you, can’t help but wonder what happened between us. We used to be happy, were so in love, where did everything go? why the sudden change? I miss you, I really do but should I lose my pride and tell you that I want you back.

And I wonder if I ever cross your mind
For me it happens all the time

Am I the only one who’s feeling this? Or do you miss me too? I don’t know what to do, I just can’t stop thinking of you and hoping that you also do.

It’s a quarter after one, I’m all alone and I need you now
Said I wouldn’t call but I lost all control and I need you now

 It’s during the times of solitude that the pain of missing you hits me hard that I begin to lose myself, lose my logic and allow myself to be controlled by my emotions.

And I don’t know how I can do without
I just need you now

 I miss you, I need you, I want you back… that’s all I know.

Another shot of whiskey can’t stop looking at the door
Wishing you’d come sweeping in the way you did before

I drown myself with alcohol hoping to see you in my crazy hallucinations, that’s how I badly miss you, that’s how much I want you to come back.

And I wonder if I ever cross your mind
For me it happens all the time

How many times in a day I wish to see you is countless, every minute without you gives me nothing but pain.

It’s a quarter after one, I’m a little drunk and I need you now
Said I wouldn’t call but I lost all control and I need you now

I need you, I want you back those are the only things I’m sure of. Should I give up my pride and beg for you to be with me again?

And I don’t know how I can do without
I just need you now

What is life without you? I’d rather live a miserable life with you than be miserable without you, I know it’s cliche but that’s how I truly feel.

Guess I’d rather hurt than feel nothin’ at all

To feel pain or feel nothing? If feeling pain means a life with you, I’d rather suffer ’cause without you I’d be lifeless.

It’s a quarter after one I’m all alone and I need you now

It’s during these moments of solitude when my head is clear that I realize that I want to be with you whatever it takes.

And I said I wouldn’t call but I’m a little drunk and I need you now

I need you, I should stop denying.

And I don’t know how I can do without

I surrender, please come back.

I just need you now

I just need you now (wait)

Ooo, baby, I need you now

Diamond 2002 Champions

As we go through life, we learn lessons, we achieve things, great or small, we go places, we meet new people whom we’ll either hate or befriend and sometimes even fall in love with. But no matter how far we’ve travelled, how much we’ve learned and achieved, how many places we’ve seen and how many people we’ve crossed our paths with, we will all at one point wonder what happened to those people whom we shared our early stages of growing up during our high school days, the people who at one point made a contribution to who you have become and we’ll end up asking “Where are you now?”

To my favorite teacher
Told me never give up
To my fifth grade crush
Who I thought I really loved
The the guys I miss
And the girls we kissed
Where are you now?
To my ex best friends
Don’t know how we grew apart
To my favorite bands
And sing a longs in my car
To the face I see in my memories
Where are you now?

Where are you now?
Cause I’m thinking of you
You showed me how
How to live like I do
If it wasn’t for you
I would never be who I am

Way back then

To my first girlfriend
I thought for sure was the one
To my last girlfriend
Sorry that I screwed up
To the ones I loved
But didn’t show it enough
Where are you now?

Where are you now?
Cause I’m thinking of you
You showed me how
How to live like I do
If it wasn’t for you
I would never be who I am

I know we’ll never see those days again
And things will never be that way again
But that’s just how it goes
People change but I know I won’t forget you

To the ones who cared
And who were there from the start
To the love that left
And took a piece of my heart
To the few who’d swear
I’d never go anywhere
Where are you now?

Where are you now?
Cause I’m thinking of you
You showed me how
How to live like I do
If it wasn’t for you
I would never be who I am
If it wasn’t for you
I would never be who I am
If it wasn’t for you I’d be nothing
Where are you now?

I smiled the first time I heard this song and also ended up asking myself “Where are you now?”, where are they now? Well, the song doesn’t really just tackle high school but rather a more broad aspect on how the people we met affects our becoming but since high school is a really memorable, I can’t help but associate the song with that part of my life.

Incidentally, two of my high school friends who happens to be my neighbor, as well, thought of having a get together and that got us all excited. We posted numerous announcements in Facebook and began texting our former classmates. Originally, we’re planning to go to Club Manila East but since it was affected by “Ondoy”, we ended up having dinner at the mall and afterwards, going off to a restobar for some drinks and music.

Last Saturday was really fun out of the 50 students in our class we were able to gather 13 people, quite small from the original population but it’s already an achievement to gather all those people considering our now so complicated schedules.

Some left early due to prior engagements, some came late and that includes me, but it was still fun, nevertheless. I felt like I was 9 years younger, I must admit I acted a bit childish, I somehow forgot what poise meant, the child in me manifested that night upon seeing the people whom I practically grew up with. We’re living different lives now, some turned out as yuppies, some are now nurses, some have their own business. The high school love teams have broken up, some have exchanged partners and now, one of us is surprisingly married with one kid. We’re different now from who we were 8 years ago when we graduated high school but no matter who we have become and who we will be, we are all a part of each others lives, the laughters, tears, jokes, stories, gossips, all these memories will remain in our hearts.

I am not sure if there will again be an event like these in the future but one thing is for sure the bond we have will always be there and we will forever be the “Diamond Champions” not just for 2002 but ’til forever.