Jellybeans- My Own version

Because of an unknown mishap I lost my ticket somewhere inside Madame Tussauds, I had no choice but to wait for my friend as she experience the view of Hong Kong atop the Sky Terrace. It was so foggy that day, even the girl at the cashier forbid me to buy another ticket to gain access at Hong Kong’s highest viewing deck. While I was waiting for her, I checked on some shops and stumbled upon a store selling jellybeans. It was quite costly for a candy, especially for someone like me who’s not fond of candies but I didn’t hesitate, I bought one bag with all the 42 assorted flavors.

I was curious on how each flavor tastes but more than that it was the memory of an internet article I read some time ago. The article was written by Noringai, I don’t know her personally but I really liked her articles, I could relate to some and learn from some. To give you a gist of her article entitled “Kwentong Jellybeans” (it actually has parts 1 and 2), it’s about how obsessed she was on a certain guy that she failed to appreciate the other guys in her life, she used her obssession on finding the elusive chocolate pudding flavored jellybeans as a metaphor to tell her story.

Let me borrow Noringai’s metaphor in this article, let me write my own version of the jellybean story.

Chocolate pudding jellybeans, everyone loves chocolates, right? Everyone likes him for me, I used to like him as well, “used” to like him,  just like the chocolate pudding flavor, he’s simple and in my own opinion he’s a safe choice. But just like Noringai’s jellybean story, it’s elusive and when I found it, it’s disappointing, nothing so special, just like chocolate pudding he’s someone I grew up with, nothing more than that.

I got over chocoloate pudding when I realized that toasted marshmallow is better. But Toasted Marshmallow didn’t last that long, it’s easy to get over something when there’s not that much to remember.

But as it turns out Chocolate pudding and Toasted Marshmallow were not my favorites, surprisingly, it’s Strawberry Cheesecake. I am not fond of strawberries so I was really surprised when I liked it’s taste, it was unique. Just like someone, he’s unique, different from all the guys I’ve ever met and I never expected that I will like him, he’s a surprise.

Then, on my recent trip to Cebu, I found out that the brand of jellybeans I bought in Hong Kong is also available here in the Philippines but there are only 20 flavors, Chocolate pudding and Toasted Marshmallow were among them. Strawberry Cheesecake is not available, not available here in the Philippines…just like him, he’s not here..he’s somewhere else.

Again, I pray

Dear Lord,

I’ve prayed for someone and you gave me one,

‘Though it’s not clear if he’s the one.

Now I’m confused,

If he is indeed…

Guide us O Lord,

Help us make it through…

If he’s not yet the one,

I’ll gladly accept.

Whoever he is, take care of him.

May we find each other

In Your time.

Amen.

One More Time- Boys Over Flowers Tidbits (Part9)

One More Time

One More Time!

ABS-CBN will re-run my favorite Koreanovela of all time, Boys Over Flowers as a gift to its fans for Christmas. No timeslot announcements have been made until now but it will be a part of the Primetime Bida, I’m just hoping that it will shown anytime from 8:30PM onwards, so that I may be able to watch it, but I think the likelihood is remote, so I guess BOF will retain it’s timeslot the first time it was shown. But I’m still hoping that my dear, Jun Pyo’s schedule will match mine

Real life Popoy and Basha…One More Chance?

When to hold on...When to let go...

They met way back in high school
He’s your average guy
She’s the average girl
No one knew he courted her
‘Though some noticed the closeness
‘Til one day people found out…
They broke up
But they remained friends
Sooner than expected
They’re back together
High School ended
But they stayed together ’til college
‘Til one day they parted ways again
He was linked to a new girl
There were guys courting her
But they still ended up looking for each other
Her mom found out about them
She tried to fight for him
But gave up soon
She left him
But time was really on their side
They met again
And gave another shot at destiny
There were fights, even other parties
But they managed to stay together
‘Til one day they finally decided to end everything.
It was almost a decade
He loves her so much
She loves him as well
But she knows something is missing
She’s happy but she wants to be happier
This is the most serious among all the breakups
For this is the only time he gave up
All the while we thought it’ll be…
From High School to Forever
It can still be,
For both are not closing doors
We’re hoping that just like Popoy and Basha
They’ll have One More Chance.

Waiting for the Fairy Tale Prince

I used to compare waiting for “The One” to waiting for ride towards a destination. I first came into this thought while I was literally waiting for an FX on my way to school, I ended up undecided between waiting for a few more minutes or just taking the jeepney. I was worried that I’ll be late for school, ’til the thought crossed my mind. In life, we often worry that we’ll be left behind by the people around us and oftentimes, we settle for less than what we want, less than what we deserve. Like the others, I was once a victim, I settled for someone less than what I deserve because I don’t want to be left behind by someone. Thank God, that it wasn’t too late for me to decide to get off that ride for I realized it will go nowhere.

Yesterday, I received an email yesterday entitled, “Let God do the Choosing”, so I suddenly remembered that day while I was waiting for a ride to school. So let me share the email with you.

Waiting sometimes feels like eternity

LET GOD DO THE CHOOSING

If men were like buses, how do you catch one?

A more important questions is – how do you catch the RIGHT one?

Simple : You take only the bus that’s headed to the RIGHT direction.

First we must allow our Heavenly Father to do the picking. And second, the decision for a mate must be made on a spiritual and intellectual basis before its made on an emotional one.

What about love?, you ask. I’ll tell you why. “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? (Jer. 17:9). The heart is wilful and is driven by its own agenda It does not consider things rationally and intelligently – it just loves to love! Therefore, you have to point it in the right directions: “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life” (Proverbs 4:23).

Whenever you meet a man, you need to get clearance from God, check out
his attributes, and then allow your heart to engage.

Dating exists not for mating; it exists for collecting data. I believe
that the biblical design would be friendship, courtship and then marriage. Friendship is two people walking together in agreement and accountability, learning and growing together. Courtship follows the mutual agreement to commit to one another exclusively – it is the
decisive turning toward the agreed-upon goal of the marriage altar. It is a period of laying a foundation and preparing your life together after marriage. But dating? Well, if you do date, use the time wisely to gather facts.

So when you do gather facts, let us compare the process to clothes shopping.

1. Check out the fabric. Is the person mate material? Does this man have an intimate relationship with the Father through Jesus Christ? Does he care what God thinks about his behavior? Is he accountable to God as well as another co-laborer in the faith? Accountability is an important factor. It is imperative to maintaining a committed relationship.

Is your potential spouse a member of the same family – the family of God? Scripture is clear on this: “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” (2 Cor. 6:14).

You need to have common interest and values and agree on the essentials of living day to day. You have a similar spiritual walk. You eat the same diet. You enjoy a lot of similar things. You have like interests, like goals in life, like opinions on basic life issues. You have had like experiences in your background. Though there is some truth to the idiom that opposites attract, like-minded folks fare better together.

Furthermore, does he want to get married? If you want to be married and your dreamboat isn’t interested, don’t waste your time. Remember, women fall in love and get married. Men decide to get married and then look for a wife. Note the difference in order. So if a guy says he’s not looking for anything serious, take his words seriously. If he’s not
going your direction, get off the bus & wait for the right one.

2. Does this man want you? Is he pursuing you? The man who is right for you will pursue you and God’s hand in the relationship will be clear. No guessing, no fleeces, no dead ends. Scripture says: “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord” (Prov. 18:22). Note – who finds whom? THE MAN FINDS THE WIFE. From the beginning of time, God has transported men & women across the world in order to put them together. At the RIGHT TIME, He will bring that man on the scene and he will find you.

In God’s perfect design, the man is the one who recognizes his mate. Adam has no problem recognizing that Eve was his missing rib. You do not need to strategically place yourself anywhere. You don’t have to help a guy out because he’s shy. Men will do whatever they have to do to get what they truly want.

The man in your life should recognize you as the pearl of great price in his life and be willing to do whatever he must in order to gain your hand. If he is passive about gaining your affections, take it as a sign that he is not interested. Many a woman’s mother has suggested that it is a good idea to marry a man who loves you more than you love him. As cold as that sounds, it actually might be scriptural if you stop to think about it: “We love him because he first loved us” (1 Jn 4:19).

Until then, take the ultimate chill pill. You don’t need a bunch of men in your life to make you feel all right about yourself. You need only one man- your man, the one God has selected to select you. And trust me, the right man at the wrong time can be just as awful as the wrong man at any time. So trust God’s timing in this. He is the ultimate matchmaker. Relax, sit pretty and allow yourself to be found.

Again – WAIT until the man voices his intentions. He should take the lead in establishing the relationship. You may have an inkling that he is the one, but God will use the man to set the tone of the relationship. Allow him the opportunity to woo you – this is your first act of submission. Jesus set the standard for all men to follow. They should love us first. And they should lead the relationship.

3. The man in your life should not desire to move into your house, only into your heart. A man who prepares for your future has made his intentions clear. A man who is husband material has the means to take care of a wife. He is a responsible human being who understands he needs to have something to offer. In short, a man should have the means to be a suitable lover for you.

4. Check out his buddies. Everyone knows birds of the same feather flock together, yet most women fail to see the connection between a man and his friends. A man’s pals tell you a lot about the person that you haven’t seen yet. They reveal things about the guy’s character that might be hidden when he is on good behavior. Everyone knows how to put
his best foot forward. Don’t stay focused on the foot, check out the rest of the body!

5. Check out his relationship with his mother. How does he treat her? This is your preview of how he will treat you. There are lots of men who, because of a negative relationship with their mothers, really don’t like women, yet say they do. Unresolved issues between mother and son continue between husband and wife.

6. Remember that a man’s family reveals the cloth from which he’s cut. Take note and decide whether you want your future with the man in your life to look like his present family situation.

7. Check out the patterns of his life. Do you see repeated cycles of drama in his personal kingdom? broken relationships? problems in making commitments? including the job market? mood swings? Is a problem always someone else’s fault? Does he embrace responsibility or shirk it? Does he keep his promises? Is he a man of good reputation?

Remember all garments look wonderful hanging in the store, but with wear, some begin to unravel. Give yourself time and space to check out the man in your life. Time will always reveal whether or not he is made of the right stuff.

8. Does this man have a vision for his life? Is he running with that vision? Remember, God decided Adam needed help once Adam got busy DOING his assignment. As we saw Adam, a man doesn’t need help until he is busy doing what he was created and called to do.

Is your guy guided by a sense of destiny and purpose, or does he just allow life to happen around him? A man who is not certain of his mission can be a most miserable person – and you’ll be miserable too if you know where YOU want to go in life. A man who has vision is not intimidated by a woman whose mission statement is clear. He will be your best ally, cheerleader and assistant because he wants you both to make it! A man who cannot be supportive of your achievements because he is floundering in a sea of uncertainty over his own life is not a healthy partner to have and to hold forever. Creating dependencies or feelings of obligation is not the way to get the best out of your man. Somewhere along the way, he will resent you and flee from the smothering burden of obligation he associates you with.

You want a man who is firmly anchored in his identity in Christ. Remember, we are looking for a man who will be priest and leader of his home. His first instinct should be to want to cover you, redeem you, and provide for you. Your job is to decide if this is the man God has ordained for you to complement.

9. Complementarity. Do your talents and gifts complement his? Do his gifts complement yours? What about your temperaments? Do you see the two of you as an effective team capable of bringing blessing to the lives of those around you? Do your futures mesh? Can you coordinate your gifts in an attractive and effective way?

This is why knowing your purpose is so important. Make sure your hearts beat for mutual causes.

When I go shopping I always consider the fabric, the fit and what I already have in my closet. Will my next purchase be a complementary addition to what I already have? If I find that I am going to have to buy shoes and matching accessories to go with a new outfit, I leave it right on the rack. It is too expensive a proposition.

If the man you meet makes you feel that you need to completely reinvent yourself, something is wrong. This is where I ask you to consider the relationship in terms of cost. Is this relationship expensive spiritually, emotional or physically? Does your longing for a mate make you willing to forfeit who you are in the process? Or does he see you as
the gift that you are?

The man in your life should consider you a rare find, a priceless jewel – because of you he is getting ready to get blessed big-time! Any relationship that causes you to feel unworthy, unlovely, unacceptable, undesirable or that you have to work for love, is too expensive!

God has called the man to cover, protect and provide not only materially for a woman, but emotionally and spiritually as well. You should be richer in mind, body and spirit for your union with the man of your dreams. The man in your life should make rich deposits into your heart and spirit, not withdrawals.

10. Does he have a healthy love & acceptance of himself? Make sure the man in your life has taken time to heal from past relationships and has made peace with himself. How he cares for himself is how he will care for you.

A man’s relationship with God is crucial here. His love for himself will only be as strong as his love for God. This is not something that you can impart. You cannot be his savior or teacher. That is out of spiritual order. In his rightful place as your personal priest, he should be leading you to a richer relationship with Christ. If he is causing you to compromise your faith and destabilize your walk, if he is leading you into sexual sin or causing you to be distracted from your commitment to Christ, the relationship is too expensive. Offending the Lover of your soul, who promises you eternal love, is too high a fare to pay for a ride that has a limited run.

If you and your man can’t soar in the Spirit, when the force of your love for another is tested by the pull or gravity of the world, your union will not be able to survive.

So you decide. How much is your life worth? How much is your love worth? You will be able to accept only what you believe you deserve. God himself calculated the worth of your love and decided it was worth His life. He now pledges you His love for eternity. Yes, Jesus sets the example for all others to follow when He paid a ransom for His bride. Should you expect less from a mortal man?

Throughout the biblical age, men were willing to pay the cost for the hand that they desired. The truth of the matter is, everyone knows that anything worth having, costs. And no one gets a ride in this life for free.

Your prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

I confess that I have not always been as careful as I should’ve been with my heart. From time to time, my desire for love has caused me to leave my heart in the wrong hands. I now commit my heart into Your hands for safekeeping.

Please help me to stop being so impulsive with what you deem so precious. As I learn to celebrate Your love for me, let me learn from Your example what a bridegroom should really be like. Help me to never settle for less than what you desire for me.

As I embrace You as the Lover of my soul, keep my affections in the haven of Your own heart. As I rest in Your love, make me more discriminating of those who approach me. I ask that You take over this area of my life. Keep me from those You know would hurt my heart. I invite You to set a hedge around me and keep me from all who would draw me into unfruitful relationships until the day you present me to the mate that You have selected for me.
Grant me the discernment to recognize him as he recognizes me. Cleanse me from the temptation to typecast the men I meet according to what I see. Help me to trust in Your knowledge and lean not on my own understanding. I know that You know what is best for me; therefore I yield to Your choice. In Jesus Name. Amen.

I totally agree with what was written above and I must admit it that I can’t help but think of one specific person but then, there is one thing lacking in him and that is the means to provide physical sustenance in the future. I’m not belittling him neither do I lack confidence in him. I believe that he is recovering maybe, he just needs to reassess his priorities to have focus on the things that urgently needs it. If he’ll be able to fix it then, maybe there can be a chance.

I do think of him as I was reading ‘though I’m not really sure if he’s the one God has chosen for me. Whoever that person maybe, I’ll be here waiting for him, for us to hold each other and take the ride to forever. 

 

Love is holding

“For behold, the darkness shall cover the earth and deep darkness the people; but the Lord will arise over you and His glory will be seen upon you.” (Isaiah 60:2)

“I am watching to see that my word is fulfilled.” (Jeremiah 1:12)

“No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life…I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Joshua 1:5)

Peter Pan… That is to grow old with you…

“Peter Pan came one night and invited me to Neverland where I can never grow old. I was about to go but I refused cause I thought of something better to do.

That is to grow old with you.”

Peter Pan and Wendy

Cheesy? What will you think if you’ll receive that quote from someone who doesn’t really forward text quotes from time to time? From someone whom you know there’s something unnamed that exists between the two of you? And what if days or maybe a week after receiving that text quote, you’ll find out that he just had a girlfriend?

I received that text quote April 2005 from someone who doesn’t really forward text quotes maybe because we use different networks and yes, there is something unnamed between the two of us, we used to be an item way back our younger years but more than that I can say that we have a “what’s between the two of us is between the two of us” situation. Sadly, days or maybe a week after receiving that text quote he told me that he already have a girlfriend.

My fairy tales, my fantasies we’re shattered. I’ll be honest to admit that I was happy receiving that message no matter how cheesy it is. It felt like finally after holding back for so long, he now has gathered the strength to tell me that “he wants to grow old with me”, that he loves me.

We both know that there is something special that exists between the two of us. He says things that makes me feel that way whenever we’re burning phone lines and exchanging messages in cyberspace. There is something special the way he looks at me and I’m not the only one who can attest to that. We never went out together ‘though we go to parties as a group. We never did what people in relationships usually do. We only hold each other’s hand when the situation calls for such as, dances. It’s an open secret that I like him, really like him but it’s also a secret what happens whenever it’s just the two of us.

I somehow understand why he chose that kind of situation for us, he’s afraid of gossips, he doesn’t like us to be in the campus limelight as couple, I understand that very well. ‘Though if you ask me, I really don’t care about the gossips and with the campus limelight thing, we’re already there as unofficial couples so what is left to be afraid of, but a teenage girl who believes and conforms with decorum can do nothing but wait for her guy to make the first move for things to be official. But that didn’t happen or maybe will never happen.

More than being who we are to each other, we’re friends. He has that gift of wisdom that enlightens me each time I need some burst of sunshine. So even after finding out that he has a girlfriend, I remained to be his friend but I need to put some distance, of course. I didn’t know, why despite of how bad I was hurt, I still managed to find the strength to face the truth. Maybe, because the truth is right in front of me and I’ve got no choice or maybe I chose to believe that I just assumed things, I was just day dreaming, there was really nothing special to begin with. I don’t have any right to know what’s behind all the innuendos because those were nothing but mere overrated actions. I chose to believe that there was nothing so that, I can just be numb.

But just a month ago, he made his presence actively felt once again. Thanks, because he was really a friend with the perfect timing, as always, to share his gift of wisdom. But we’re back to where we were before and things are more complicated now that we’re older. He is and will still be that special person who was generous enough to share his friendship with me but, he will also be that person who hurt me.

Things changed, I’ve changed maybe he also changed. I know, I shouldn’t be affected anymore because I don’t like him now but, it’s the questions left unanswered, the what if’s and feelings left unsaid. I was left hanging and maybe I will wonder all my life what could have been? ‘Though it wouldn’t matter now, whether it’s a yes or a no but closure is all I’m asking for.

It could be he wants to ask for a chance now, maybe he’s ready now, I don’t know I don’t want to assume, again. But all I know is no matter how beautiful Peter Pan and Wendy’s story is, no matter what they had to go through still…Wendy didn’t end up marrying Peter Pan, because he refused to grow while Wendy chose to grow and just move on. I am still his Wendy, and I also chose to be brave, grow and move on but I still think about him at times, he’ll always be a part of me. My Peter Pan might have been afraid of the consequences of growing old with me but just in case he finally decided, he is a bit late now to be honest but who knows, maybe in time, I can transform as Moira.

Gah-Sah-Hamnida

All the people around us exist for a reason, some are there to be strong for us when we’re weak, while others make us feel wanted, some exist to keep balance, while some shakes up things, others make us cry so we can stay human while others make us laugh all the time, others makes us go nuts and be crazy while others exist to bring wisdom, and in my life,that’s you.

Whether we like it or not, our lives are somehow connected, we can almost say that we practically grew up together. We’re friends, that’s for sure and you’re one of those people whom I can truly trust. I sincerely hope that you know and you can feel that I really do.

I don’t know what you think about me, I ‘ve done all sorts of crazy things and said a lot of stupid stuffs before. Most of the time, I want to faint when I remember those silly things while talking to you, most especially when we’re face to face. Many times I wished that your memory is so poor that you can’t remember any of the foolishness. ‘Though it’s pretty obvious that you still remember things but never mentioned it directly. You never assumed anything despite of the obvious, you caught me billions of times throwing sureptitious glances at you, which means you are looking at me too, oh here I go again, assuming.

We never talked about it and as I said you never assumed anything, ‘though we know that there is something that exists. We can talk over the phone and chat over YM freely but not the same as when we’re face to face, we both know that it’s not easy, people around us will surely notice the closeness, the way we look at each other and just like me they’ll assume things, things which are far greater than what I assume and sometimes rumors are created out of it.

I must admit that I like you or may be even loved you at a certain point. I even got mad at you for breaking my heart thrice but you never noticed that ’cause I didn’t allow you to. I heard all the rumors and saw the actual evidences, leading me to hold on to the belief that the feelings are mutual but you are just afraid, so I ended up broken hearted. It’s like we’re characters in the story Leaf, Tree and Wind, I am the leaf, you are the tree and ok fine, he’s the wind. What else can a girl do but wait, right?

We had our own love lives, we had lost contact with them but us? we still have our “friendship”. I’ve let you go, it wasn’t easy ’cause you’re presence is still felt every now and then. You might not know the actual day of my birthday, I can’t blame you for being confused and I know dates are your weakness but you still didn’t miss greeting me. Christmas and New Year are not complete without receiving even just a simple greeting from you.

Maybe, you’re one of the “over rated” things is my life but let it be. For I’ve got thousands of reasons to be thankful for having you. You are my strength and my weakness, at times. You’re wisdom gives me realization, you’re optimism makes me see how beautiful life is. When it comes to friendship, you have the perfect timing but other than that?…never mind.

You’re sudden active presence in my life surely will stir up things and I must admit that I don’t want a real life Gossip Girl thing to be in existence, it’ll only complicate things. I am thankful for you, that I would never deny but somehow I am afraid where this might lead again for the nth time for God knows how hard it is to battle my so-called 100 squares of letting go especially when I know I don’t have a reason to get mad at you apart from you doing things and saying things that leads me to stupid misinterpretations.

It’s hard to stop things from happening, especially when it involves things we can’t take control of. I don’t know if I should allow myself to be once again an all too willing victim or if I should use the better part of my brains that is telling me to stop.

So for now, let me just say thanks for having the gift of wisdom and sharing it with me, thanks for giving me a reason to smile no matter how life has treated me badly.

For now, all I can say is “Thank You”.

Fairy Tales

“You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales, that fantasy of what your life would be, white dress, prince charming who would carry you away to a castle on a hill. You would lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close you could taste them, but eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is its hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true.” – Meredith Grey, Grey’s Anatomy

We’re all hoping for fairy tale stories, ending up with that first infatuation you had, crossing paths with your soon-to-be prince at a coffee shop one rainy morning, marrying your first love, ending up with your first blind date, finding that one great love and dying in each other’s arms when you’re a 101 years old. We all have our own picture of once upon a time and happily ever afters.

We all believed in these fairy tales even just once but as we go through life we realize little by little that the reality we are living is far different from the movie-like love story we once imagined it to be.

It’s amazing how you find that person whom you are destined to spend the rest of your life with, much more to fall in love with that same person. Because oftentimes, that one great love and the person you end up marrying are not the same person. Maybe, it’s true that ‘though we are all destined for someone it doesn’t guarantee that, that certain someone will be our one great love.

Lots of love stories, real or fiction surrounds us, the classic cinderella, the simple girl and the popular guy, best friends falling for each other, even vampires falling in love with their human prey, but we all have our very own love stories to tell, right?

I love fairy tales as a kid, I believe in prince charmings and castles in a far away land but as it turns out I’m a 23-year old girl who can’t imagine herself getting married in the future to anyone, a girl who doesn’t know how to respond appropriately to text messages, who rejects the one she’s been chasing the moment he chases her, the girl who’s in love with the beautiful feeling of wanting someone unattainable.

I’m that person who can’t manage to finish this article ’cause she’s so confused on whether to wait for the ship at the shore or to swim towards it, asking herself how far to build that bridge of destiny ’cause it might be construed as one hopeless case of putting herself so out in the open. Do sparks really exist or it’s just an invented thing that successfully preoccupied all of the hopeless romantics like us?  To stop believing in magic or to wake up to the reality that there is no such thing? That Peter Pan only exists in books, it is only there where he does fly.

Maybe the reason why fairy tales are made is for us to escape the bitter pains of reality but despite how reality throws one curve ball after another we still hope against our better judgement that one day we’ll have that chance on happily ever after.

Someone who’s practically a stranger texted me today and I am clueless how to handle things like these. This reality is too far from the imagined fairy tale. I could possibly have a flat one in any Accounting subject but when it comes to things like these, I’m such a loser.

Slowly, the number of my single friends are diminishing and I’ll be a hypocrite not to admit that fear is beginning to enter my system ‘though I’m still happy and contented at this point which is more scary ’cause it might mean that I’m not really genetically wired to be with someone.

Oh well, sorry, for this nonsense. After all, there is such a thing as “faith”.

“At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don’t really expect it. Its like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And its not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you , and once in a while people may even take your breath away.” – Meredith Grey, Grey’s Anatomy

Horizon

Staring at my office window with the horizon on my view…
Somehow it gives me comfort,
To know that even at a far distance,
I can still see the place where you must be…
Hoping that as I whisper my longing for you to the wind,
You’ll answer that you’re wishing just the same…

* Found these words saved on my cellphone’s notes, didn’t know when I wrote these…

From a distance

I must admit that I still remember you,
I’m running out of day dreams,
On how once again our paths will cross.

Wishing that if that day will come,
You’ll see me the way I want you to.

My view from where I am,
Somehow gives me comfort.

That I can still see,
Where I assume you are.

It gives me hope,
From a distance,
That the day I am wishing for will come.

* The picture above is the view on my office window.